Lost

Sometimes I feel lost, trapped between worlds.  One world is my old world – where I thought that I was happy and healthy.  I was a bit wrong about that.  One world is my “sick” world where I don’t feel well and I don’t feel like doing anything.  The heat and humidity is not helping with that.  And the last world is, hopefully, my new world.  My new world is a place where I am as healthy as I can be and happy. I want to be in that world.  I struggle on exactly how I will get to that world.  I can’t really go back to doing things they way I used to do them – I was clearly too stressed and unnecessarily so.  Balancing work and family still seems hard to me. Although, I have decided to make some specific changes.  For example, I plan to meditate at work.  This is something that I would have never done before but I don’t see why I can’t take 15 minutes in my day, perhaps right after I teach, to chill and re-group. I’m actually really excited about this new plan.  I have my own quiet office, so why not.  I hope to get more yoga sessions in at work and I hope to just be more relaxed.  Some things are not worth that amount of attention that I have them, negative attention that is.  I will spend more time focused on my children and less on work.  Work will always be there.  My children will grow and I want to be there to watch them.  Well, I started my post feeling quite tired. I think that I’ll head off for a walk now.

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